Hi Guys, as promised here is part 2 of “Tips to get past a relationship break up”. Below I have included some tips that would be taught to you in a counselling session and of course my own personal tips too!
The Wheel of Life
The biggest tip I could give anyone who is just out of a relationship is to start looking into other areas in your life. Start giving your time and energy into other parts of your life. To do this and to give you inspiration you can use the wheel of life. This is a powerful tool that illustrates the individual’s determinants of success. It encourages us to consider all areas of life. Below is an example of the wheel of success. This is just one example, there are many more examples available free online.
As you can see “relationships/romance” is only a small part in that wheel. There are so many other areas in your life that you can redirect your attention and time to. Look into other areas such as work, personal growth, hobbies, and fitness. Determine where you are now with each of them and where you want to be, set goals to help keep you motivated.
So many questions may arise from doing this, such as: going back to college, changing jobs, taking up a new hobby, a fitness plan, going travelling, learning more into an area that is of interest to you, starting a new project and many more!
You may also find after a break up that you have a lot more time on your hands, then use that spare time in other areas of your life. You’d be surprised how a heart-breaking break up can drive you to succeed in other parts of your life!
Qualities that you can bring to a relationship
This tip is to help boost your confidence again. After a break up your confidence may be affected, it can be inevitable in some cases. But being aware of this, you can start to build your confidence back again. A good way to do this is to look at all of the good qualities that you can bring to a relationship. What are the positive qualities/traits about yourselves that you will be bringing to your next relationship?
After a break up it’s easy to become self-critical on ourselves and start viewing all of the negatives about ourselves. Since we already know all of the negatives about ourselves, let’s look at the positives. Let’s look at everything that you can bring to a relationship.
Everything you write down, hang on to it, this is to remind you of your positive qualities on the days when you are not feeling very confident. Self-help confidence books are also great to read after a break up, to help give you that boost back.
There is a cliché that time heals all things, and in this case of heartbreak it is true. One day you will wake up to find that something has shifted. You will feel free to be yourself again. Instead of wanting to hang onto what you had, you will see why you had to let it go. Trust in the process and you will find your way back to normality again and even to a happier life.
I hope these few tips will help you through the break up stages. Remember, after a break up it can feel like your life is over and that you will never laugh, smile, or be able to move on again. But you will be able to find happiness again and be able to move on.
These experiences can end up making you stronger and you will be one day glad that they happened to you. Remember that relationships is only a small part in your life, there are so many other areas in your life that you can redirect your attention to while you are healing.